001 — Text — UN: SHINIGAMI

[mikoshi]

[ Text only from the guy who hates calls and/or being recorded. ]

Got it — that gold-red fern that only opens up during the day? Tobacco like.

Gives you a headache first time you smoke it, but afterwards? Smooth sailing.

Bring me samples of the leaves, drier the better. Found rolling papers.

Or don't. I'm not your mom.

[ Yet despite saying that, attached comes a picture of the aforementioned plant (Sun's Lace), two samples in view: one healthy, the other dried up. ] So you gonks don't poison yourselves toking up the wrong herb.

You're welcome ᝰ🚬

Comments

[mikoshi]

Alright, long as you don't make me shave and/or wax. Ingrown hairs are a bitch

Some peeps are fucking annoying. Others are chill. Glad I found nicotine though. Can handle it now that Berserk OS ain't regulating my hormones for me

[rebelsamurai]

Fuck no! If I wanted a hairless twink that looks like Nibbles, I would just order one from Twinktopia or some shit.

That bad, huh? Yeah, I’ve noticed that our less than gracious hosts have a sense of humor. Even most military recruitment centers have a better selection.

[mikoshi]

Supposedly also hurts like a bitch putting on tights when your legs are furry. But with my dick huge and my pain endless, I tread onward

Mean, kinda glad no one here got recruited by the likes of the NUSA or Militech — same shit, really — offering a healthcare plan to go blow up villages in Nicaragua. But would it have killed them to pick up a few more jarheads? Shit's so dire I'd take Kurt Hansen

[rebelsamurai]

”This is Kurt Hansen, and my only contribution to society is being a bullet bag.”

Heh, I couldn’t help myself.

Maybe it’s a good thing we aren’t hurling through space on a glorified crotch rocket with a bunch of jarheads. Our Hosts probably don’t intend on us doing much fighting. If that’s the case, we’re golden.

However, we both know that’s bullshit…

So yeah, I’m a little worried.

[mikoshi]

Not bad

I'm sure there's other heavy hitters besides us. But I ain't holding my breath for Security

[rebelsamurai]

There has to be or else we’re fucked. As much as I trust you, Vince, I know we can’t handle this bullshit solo.

Fuck, neither of us even know where we are. We’re just hurling through space with a thought and a prayer.

But enough about that, I’m kind worried about that hole in your head.

[mikoshi]

Which hole? Be specific

[rebelsamurai]

The one where "I" used to reside. Are you completely healed or something?

I have a brand new body, but you haven’t had a proper checkup since we arrived.

[mikoshi]

That

[ No point in lying to Johnny, is there? ] Didn't want to think about it. Accepted still only got half a year worth of gas in the tank

[rebelsamurai]

Shit.

[Well, that explains some things. Vince isn’t even sure if he’ll live to see tomorrow, nevertheless a year. This is really fucked.]

Yeah, fuck all this other bullshit. We need to get you to a doctor. A real one, not some fucking ripperdoc but an actual doctor.

[mikoshi]

I'll go with you — but not these other shitheels [ Doesn't need the judgment, nor the pity. ] Just us

[rebelsamurai]

Don’t worry, I’m not letting anyone work on you without your consent and my permission. I don’t trust most people.

But we definitely need to start looking for a doctor. I’m going to ask around. There has to be at least one competent doc somewhere on this ship.

In the meanwhile, ease up on the new smokes? Yeah, yeah, I fuckin’ said it.

[mikoshi]

Sure hope so [ Trying not to sound too dejected, but he's exhausted, emotionally and physically. Hiding his symptoms hasn't been easy. ]

Fuck Johnny, seriously? Only thing keeping me sane right now

[rebelsamurai]

Do you think I’m joking? Hell, I’ll even stop smoking if that means getting you happy and healthy.

We’re a two for one deal, Vinny. If you go, so do I. That’s just how it is, so let’s try to avoid that.

[mikoshi]

Then find me something else that takes off the edge. [ Vincent won't admit it, but he's tired of being in pain. Or at least, this kind of pain, which doesn't drive him towards anything but rotting in bed. Ends up the Berserk OS and the rest of the chrome were doing a lot of heavy lifting to keep his mind (and body) off the fact it was falling apart around him. ] Otherwise? No deal

[rebelsamurai]

Fine, you can keep smoking your space weed for now. I won't stop you.

[ That is until he finds something better for Vincent to try. He's going to make it his mission to find a way to help V. ]

I just demand you actually get some fucking rest, asshole.

[mikoshi]

What, you gonna bring me breakfast in bed? You can't cook, kono baka [ Fuck it, he's not switching keyboards for that. ]